NOT A SINGLE FUCK GIVEN
Zella Day – East of Eden
i cant even make it past the table of contents im laughing too hard
WHAT IS THIS BOOK!?!
I NEED THIS BOOK TODAY NOW LIKE AIR AND CHOCOLATE. LIKE CHOCOLATE AIR.
246,000 notes and we still don’t have what book this is?!
SOMEBODY TELL ME WHAT BOOK THIS IS!!!
"Zeus Grants Stupid Wishes: A No-Bullshit Guide to World Mythology," by Corey O’Brian and Sarah E Melville, published by Penguin Books USA.
Here’s the blurb:
Cronus liked to eat babies.
Narcissus probably should have just learned to masturbate.
Odin got construction discounts with bestiality.
Isis had bad taste in jewelry.
Ganesh was the very definition of an unplanned pregnancy.
And Abraham was totally cool about stabbing his kid in the face.
All our lives, we’ve been fed watered-down, PC versions of the classic myths. In reality, mythology is more screwed up than a schizophrenic shaman doing hits of unidentified…wait, it all makes sense now. In Zeus Grants Stupid Wishes, Cory O’Brien, creator of Myths RETOLD!, sets the stories straight. These are rude, crude, totally sacred texts told the way they were meant to be told: loudly, and with lots of four-letter words.
Skeptical? Here are a few more gems to consider:
• Zeus once stuffed an unborn fetus inside his thigh to save its life after he exploded its mother by being too good in bed.
• The entire Egyptian universe was saved because Sekhmet just got too hammered to keep murdering everyone.
• The Hindu universe is run by a married couple who only stop murdering in order to throw sweet dance parties…on the corpses of their enemies.
• The Norse goddess Freyja once consented to a four-dwarf gangbang in exchange for one shiny necklace.
And there’s more dysfunctional goodness where that came from.
I want it.
i love this photo because at first you think that she was going to get married but instead her husband to be left her, or something like that. but actually its quite the opposite. i clicked on the source and it brought me to an article explaining the story behind this photo, and shes not crying, shes hungover. her and her husband went to a football game on their wedding day, and got extremely drunk and partied all night. they took the subway home because they couldn’t drive. so no, its not a sad heartbreaking story, its a crazy joyful one. which in my opinion makes the picture even more amazing.
CAN PEOPLE PLEASE REBLOG THE PIC WITH THIS CAPTION^ AND NOT THE ONE WHERE EVERYONE IS SAD AND ARE LIKE “POOR GIRL GOD BLESS”
Crave on and on. And on.
I ain’t even mad because BK is doing Tumblr marketing quite well.